I have been thinking of living my life in the most sacred way, that involves getting my crap inside the convent and eating papaya everyday to decrease my libido. A lot of issues boggle my head so I decided to stop thinking instead. As the journey of undeniably vague decisions continue, I met someone who’s actually been existing, been there all along but I never noticed. I felt his presence through the amazing gift of technology passing through the cables and wires of the godlike computer. I barely can’t able to move now that he’s almost completely transformed into this ungodly thing that I couldn’t bear, feebly uses his claw to lift my head up using a shotgun, signaling me to must say yes. As i must say, I am nothing more but a mere kid aged very close to maturity. Behind the screen and pictures of teenage vanity was this kid I never thought will be part of my little world of doom, darkness and dorkness. :) He’s like a happy meal every kid wanted and luckily I was one of the few kids who got up of the crew. He is high spirited. He teaches me right from wrong though at my age I’m supposed to know those things, and when I was about to give up he pushed me up and told me wisdom I already knew but never used. He complains of my behavior and complains again, over and over because it becomes increasingly unacceptable. He complains more to my cellphone skills because i suck on it. He opened my eyes to reality and got me the feeling of being scolded like he’s my father. He speaks words I never expected from him and makes me laugh my heart out. He never misses a day repeatedly saying he loves me.He dances like a hobo but watching him feeling the house music aura keeps my heart beat faster like the lubdub thing. The scent of his skin makes me feel safe and that keeps me wondering why. He helds my hand like it is made to lock each fingertips just perfect for not letting go.:) His bloodline is almost engulfing the Philippine archipelago, knowing this he smiled with a tiny check on his outer canthus. how about discussing things like politics? sucks to me though, i never cared about it but i guess his mouth is meant to speak chili on a lot of issues going around here on earth and the outer space. he’s some guy of the early 20’s whos wisdom is that of a 40 year old father who teaches philosophy in some sort of a school Harry Potter got his ass on. i am the living proof of impossibility. he is the living proof of an intense emotional beat. we are the living proof of reality. i love him. i dont know how i got here, but the thing is i have proved that my heart still works after everything it has gone thru. i love him and he has been a part of me. i guess thats just the way it is, making it real. :)

LISTEN.

UNDERSTAND.

ANTICIPATE.

LISTEN to whatever the lil kid must say. it might be thoughts u don’t wanna hear but

UNDRSTAND. understand that whatever she says are just plain answers to clarify your sometimes irrelevant questions and playful thoughts.

ANTICIPATE to whatever mistake she might make. it might be a mistake on your own realization but as the world sees it, basically it is normal.

older people, shut your mouth when u are unsure. if u think u are sure, think agen.
LISTEN, your not that old, ur mind is.

while some people hover in overwhelming,overemphasized possesions of their half-true state of affairs, some trivial people of my kind for example eavesdrop on their talks, shuts up, processes the linguistic unit and blog them. i certainly cannot fathom how boasters got their guts on things like talking exaggerated thoughts that focuses on their fabric self  and  their pointer finger above their chest. They’re like fluttering on thin air gracefuly dances with the perfumed atmosphere yet never aware of the fact that they still look like tissue paper nothing less but lanky.

i have been thinking of ending everything about my story in an instant because in my own realization it is the only way i could hurt them.i know they’ll be in grief but i know they’ll be just fine eventually when time heals my lost.(that kinda changed my mind) but as much as i wanted to vanish, is as much more as i wanted to see how my story ends.

oh well i guess i have to live. not leave.

^_^